Letter to a 10 year old me

. - I have been away for a while. Lets just say it was a "Pregnant Pause". Baby got Back. Here is what I wrote for the past many months. Until Tomorrow.

Letter to a 10 year old me 

Dear Kau, 

1. You don’t know this yet, but the world is a fabulous place filled with amazing people. There are extraordinary acts of kindness, amazing stories of love, enchanting travels, fascinating points of view, interesting perspectives and heart warming bonds just waiting for you to cross paths with them. Tread carefully and savor everything that comes your way ! 
2.  Life – is going to take your breath away. Sometimes, its going to be because you have the wind knocked right out of you and it hurts so much – you can hardly breathe. At other times, its going to be because you are so happy – you just can’t help feeling a bit giddy from it all. Keep Breathing. There will be times, many times in your life when your breath will be the only companion you have. Nurture this relationship. It will keep you grounded.Before you do anything, say anything, get provoked – Breathe.When you are first in line at a red light, and the signal turns green, before you hit the gas and make a run for it – Breathe.When you are waiting in line to make the big presentation that could change your work life – Breathe.While the pot is simpering and you can hardly wait to taste the new dish you just cooked up – Breathe.When you are lying in bed at night, surrounded by darkness and your inner demons turn up to tease you.Breathe.When you get off the treadmill after burning rubber and want to eagerly gulp some cold water..Breathe.When the love of your life asks you to marry him.Breathe.Practice it.It will help you develop temperament and perspective.Your breath will be your best friend if you - only let it.
3. One day – you will learn to appreciate the yummy taste of water.The only fizz that you need  is in your life and in your steps. Drink 2 litres of water everyday.It will save you a lot of visits to the doctor.Stay away from Soda. You will never regret it.    
4. Falling is love is easy. Staying in love is harder. Finding someone who will love you back is hardest. And believe me …nobody gets it right the first time.  Our society places far too much importance on the concept of happily ever after and the institution of marriage.  It is better to be happy alone than feel like a complete wreck with someone. Chances are that you will end up being the last of your many friends to find someone. Chances are that they will counsel you on how you should find someone to marry.  Chances are that you will cause your family and parents much grief by being a 30 year old single woman.  Chances are that you will spend many evenings with nothing to do because all your friends are busy with their own lives. Take your chances.  You will know when you are ready. And remember that just because you are ready to settle down – does not mean that you are ready to settle…Do it your way.
5. You are unique. Humans are mostly made of chemicals. And all those chemicals magically stay together because of electric charge to make a living breathing you. It’s the miracle of life. Your life.  Live it. Love it. Learn from it. No one can judge you unless they’ve walked in your shoes and had your life experiences. So hear what everyone has to say, but listen to your heart. You will sleep better that way.
6. You will learn to value time. Unfortunately – the circumstances that teach you this lesson will be hard and trying. But it will be a lesson well learnt. You will cry over rivers of spilt milk, sunk costs and squander way too many opportunities before you realize the value of the fleeting minute.But when you learn this, you will learn it rather well. Kal Ho na Ho. Aaaj – make it worthwhile. Run harder. Type faster. Hug Tighter. Breathe Deeper. Kya pata – Kal Ho na Ho !Let me state the obvious to you.  There are 4 weeks in a month. 12 months in a year. That means that an average life of 85 years – has only 4080 weeks. And one less after this week turns the clock. So what are you going to do to make this Saturday memorable??
7. Waiting is a wonderful thing.  Amazing things can happen to you while you wait. You will have a fantastic time if you can get over the fear of waiting. Life is like a basketball game. Sometimes – there is more bench time. So what?  When you get to play – the point is to make those 60 seconds count! …Maybe you will realize one day – that waiting was the best thing to happen to you!  Maybe you will study more, build some character, maybe a sense of humor, travel to uncharted places, cultivate cherished friends, eat savory foods, write a passionate blog and have remarkable experiences.  And maybe you will do this while you wait for something – someone.
8. Sometimes not getting what you want means that a FANTASTIC life waits for you around a corner you would have never turned given a choice of your own!  Your life will be defined by the choices others around your make. Far more than some of your own. So if you have to choose – Choose Life. Choose to be happy. Choose to be the creator of your own destiny, of your own safety net, of your own comfort zone of your own laughter!
9. You will make horrible mistakes. And you will regret them. Immensely. There will be words you will wish you had never said. Tears you will wish you had never cried. Trust you will wish you had never shattered. You will survive chronic loneliness, crushing unemployment, terrible humiliation, bitter rejection, destroyed friendships and shattered relationships. And some of these will take you quite a long time to recover from.  Don’t try to avoid them. Fate often finds us on the path we take to avoid it. One of the hardest lessons you will learn along the way is how to forgive yourself. 
10.  Never be afraid of loving your friends openly. It’s the only way to embrace the family you were not born with but created yourself.  Love them, defend them and cherish them. This will make you vulnerable and weak at times.  Do it anyways.  Don’t ever flatter them. Tell them the truth. They will appreciate it and will take you seriously. You will find that friends are a lot of hard work. It is hugely worth the effort.
11.  Never waste a chance to tell someone that you love them. One day you are hugging a snuggly 2 year old and before you blink – he’s a lanky 5 year old who doesn’t want to be hugged because PDA is for girls. Kids grow up. Time waits for no one. And never for love. Make every minute count. Don’t fight with your parents. Its really not worth it. Learn to ignore some things that they say. They weren’t provided with a handbook titled “Raising Kau” that explains in detail a foolproof way to ensure that they do everything right. They make mistakes too. So give them a chance. One day you will realize what amazing friends they can be. If only you let them. Tell them that you love them often.The consequences of love, being loved and loving back will change how you see everything. Let it. 
12. There is nothing that a hot cup of tea and a heartfelt hug won’t solve. Sometimes, watching a swollen tea bag come to life in a mug of steaming hot water is like watching an opera in a ceramic cup. And you will learn to immensely enjoy the drama and friendship that lie in a cup of chai. When you feel cold – it will warm you. When it’s too hot – it will calm you down. When you are happy – it will cheer you along and when you are sad.. It will comfort you. And one day you will be very happy that you were born after tea was discovered.
13.  There are three relationships that will define you. The ones you have with yourself, your God and your mother. They will be mirror images of each other. When one suffers, the other will feel the pain….Like a lousy Subhash Ghai movie. And the hardest of times is when they will all clash with each other. This will happen rarely. But when it does, boys …take a breath and tie yourself to the mast. It will most certainly pass but will most definitely be tough.
14. CELEBRATE! Make a habit out of it. Celebrate the arrival of the rains, the new litter of kittens down the street, an unexpected breeze, finding a good book, meeting an old friend, a freshly brewed cup of coffee, a trespassing leaf, making a new friend, the odd nation - wide strike that leaves you at home, a new pair of heels, Friday evenings. Celebrate every day. Rejoice. Swirl. Take a bow. You are born with more than what most of the world wakes up to. So if you want to cry – make it 5 minutes and a good howl and then to hell with it!Shimmy and rock the day! Nothing is unfixable, insurmountable, and undoable. Thank your stars and raise a toast! 
15.   Develop a prayer routine. First thing in the morning. Last thing at night. Whatever works for you.  You will spend a lot of time alone in your life and learning early how to have an open honest conversation with God will make things easy for you when you really need some divine intervention. Never hesitate to question your faith. Faith is meant to be questioned so it can be redeemed and strengthened. When you question your faith, it’s time to pray harder.
16.   Learn to spend time alone. It will change your soul. There is far too much noise and clutter in the world for it to make sense all the time. Alone Time is like a gym for the soul. A much needed exercise. Go for a walk, gaze out of a window, cook, clean, whatever it takes. Invest in a “me” routine. It will keep you younger and make you more honest.
17.  Never go to bed with your ego. At the end of each day – keep it aside. Sometimes, this will involve looking at the mirror and saying “I was a jackass today”. Sometimes this will involve making late night calls and saying how sorry you are that you were a moron. Sometimes this will mean less sleep. Do it anyways. Strange things can happen if you eat a little humble pie once in a while. Its south beach for your mind.
18. Your health is the best gift you can give yourself. Learn to eat well and exercise. Nothing you do or want to do means anything if you aren’t healthy when it happens. Your body is a temple. Don’t feed it trash. Sometimes this may mean that you are uncool. Often it may mean that you sleep early so you can hit the gym before work the next day. Your body is where you live. And your health includes your mind. This means taking care of your mental health and learning to avoid toxic people and situations. This will be harder than most diets. Just Do it. Think happy, be happy, eat happy, live happy and love happy.
19. Don’t take life seriously. Like they say – no one gets out of it alive anyways. Your life is your free trip around the sun in the solar system. Enjoy the sights, savor the experience and remember  to have a good time.  Walk in the sunshine, paint your toe nails hot pink and experience the miracle of life! And don’t ever get too bogged down that you forget how exceptionally fortunate you are.
20. In the years to come, you will make many plans. Plan to ace that science test, plan to become a house captain, plan to become an engineer, plan to study abroad, plan to get married, plan to have kids, plan vacations and brunches and finances and gym sessions...Most of all – Plan on having a good time… .You will sulk and cry and stress and try damn hard to do otherwise, but what you don’t know yet and I do – is that it’s inevitable.  Things are going to workout – when you least expect them too and you are going to be grateful and hugely thankful for all the good and the bad cards that life deals your way.

So Chin up young person and Seize the day ! ..Life is waiting :)
Sincerely,
Kau –Age 33