Journey to the center of the universe

May the road rise to meet you

The sunshine warm on your face

The rain fall softly at your feet

The wind be behind your back

And until we meet again - May God hold you in the hollow of his hand

"Irish Proverb"

Everyday is a winding road

Someone very French once said "Plus ça change, plus c’est pareil.." ...for the rest of us it means that the more things change ..the more is it that they remain the same. I guess its taken a while for me to realise that this is applicable for the rest of us not born in Bordeaux or Marseilles.
So when I refer to Coke as "Soda" and still call Iced Tea "Sweet Tea" ..and draw weird looks for my fellow mumbaites, I know deep in my heart whats at work. At other times, when I start the wipers instead of the headlights or the sign indicators - its less amusing.
My driving school instructor is Hussain. Hussain is extremely profound. When I stop in mind boggling traffic to let people pass by (come to a screeching halt worthy of a week long whiplash injury is mor like it ..but ohh well) ...he says " Madam ..ab aane wale ko kaun rok sakta hai"
= " Who can stop anyone who wants to pass"...and says wonderful movie worthy sentences like
"Dheere se clutch release kijiye ..aur pyaaar se accelerator deejeye" = "Release the clutch slowly and press the accelerator lovingly" ....and so on the class continues. First day a team of 4 dogs decided to play catch -catch in front of my car. The second day, a radioactive rooster flew out of nowhere and landed one centimeter away from my wheels" ... so Hussain says "Madam ..yeh animal log bahut pyaar karta hai aapse" = "These animals love you very much looks like" ...and when I put my car in reverse gear he frowned and said .."Gear naa..style se change karna mangta hai" = "Gears should always be changed in great style" ..and then proceeded to show me with great aplomb how to change gears fashionably ...
I guess it doesnt need any saying ...but I lovveeeee my driving class.
It makes the humid mumbai summer and an hour long dust bath ...worth every penny of it!
Last week I kidnapped a friend and took him to the museum. It was the price he had to pay for taking me out to eat lunch and after I placed my order ..telling the waiter to make it "low calorie"
Prince of Wales Museum is now called Chaatrapati Shivaji Maharaj Vastu Sanghralaya"
It got me thinking....how much of our identities and personalities are related to our names. What if my name was something completely different. Would I be a changed person ? .
.I am guessing. ...maybe ..
I also happened to go to a store to buy some clothes and a very rude customer service rep told me that I needed to look at a bigger size...right in front of three extremely skinny 20 year olds who promptly giggled... When he saw my aghast face ..he said .. "I guess if you are buying a gift for someone else ..you can look at this section" ... so I pretended to buy a gift for like 5 minutes and then asked him what the next size was ..and he said .."Ohh ..we dont carry a bigger size" ...
!@#$% !.....Seriously ...I mean Seriously ...... ?!
Bombay is as energized as ever. I go running every morning in a garden called "Sardar Vallabhai Patel Udyaan" ...and the first day I was very excited at my form and speed only to realise I was the only person under 50 years of age in that park. ..never mind... so much for my idle fantasies of becoming an Olympic triathlon wild card entry winner .....
Planning a vacation for one person has its own light moments. I sat with a travel agent for an hour listening to her spin a wild love story about a week long tour in Italy ...and tried to make her realise that I wasnt interested time and again ...but after 40 minutes of getting nowhere I got desperate ..and must have made all kinds of noises/faces ..she finally took a minute to breathe and I dropped my bomb ..."I'm travelling A-L-O-N-E. I dont think that me sitting by myself in a gondola in venice with a bar of chocolate for company is going to be a good vacation"
Next. ...we are still trying to find a place where I can travel A-L-O-N-E.
Lol! ... She did suggest a fabulous trip to the Arctic Circle ...but I think if I cant handle a gondola ..then fat chance I can do a crusie ship ! ...I think at this point in my life ..me and Bridget Jones ..we would have been good friends.
So now she asked for a letter stating my intent to travel signed by both my parents. Called the ticketing guy to ask for booking air tickets ..and I'm listening to a conversation they are having.
My travel agent is saying " ..Ya ya ...just one ticket ...single passenger ...ya ..ya ... she is travelling alone ...no-no ..doesnt have a husband ...all alone..." ......Three Cheers for making your customer feel happy ! ...seriously ....if it wasnt this funny ...it would have been very very seriously sad ... lol!!
Bombay has been amazing so far. Like a bar of bittersweet chocolate. Something or someone always surprises me every day. Sometimes the results are disastrous but then again ..whats a good ride without a few speed bumps that slow you down so you can enjoy the scenery better.
I guess like an iconic rockstar once said emphatiocally ....
Every day is a winding road....I guess I get a little closer to feeling fine :)

Old Wine in New Bottle

Take One:

There are tons of eloquent things written about change. Gandhi once said that we must be the change we wish to see in the world. Marcus Aurelius once said that the Universe is change. Our life is what our thoughts make of it. But the truth is that change is like bungee jumping. You can stand at the edge of the cliff all geared up and watch 10 jumps and feel our heart pounding and then listen to zillions rave about how good it is to feel weightless but until you take that leap yourself - you wont really know.

So every once in a while - you've got to stand up and take that chance. For better or for worse. For richer or for poorer. And watch them tides turn. Like I have. And I am waiting to become yesterday;s news or tomorrows newspaper.

One way or the other. Do or Die. Karo ya Maro.

What will unfold has already been written by the hand that wills me. Whats left to design is the precise way in which I find out.

And meanwhile all I can do is sit back and smile at this game life has become. Roll a Die anyone..

Take Two:

I went to Archies Gallery today to buy some stationary. I asked for a letter set - with writing pads and envelopes. I was told that they hadn't stocked any in a while. "Madam - Email ke zamanein mein letter kaun likhta hai" ?

Hum Likhte hain.

No history book has ever been written online bhaiya. Online to sirf Blog likhte hain!

So I'm stuck writing letters on A4 paper. Oh well. Not complaining. The day the post office shuts down - that day I'll stop writing letters. Until then - Pen is mightier than the keyboard.

Take Three:

On the way back I was reading the Economic Times. There was a front page article about how wine bottles would no longer have corks. Apparantly it was cheaper to make and preserve bottles with Aluminium caps. Twist and Put away types. What on earth is the world coming too ?

The entire romatic appeal of uncorking a bottle of wine - the love, the drama, the magic, the nervous tension. All of it. GONE. No more wine cellars but shelves of vertically stored vino much like beer. Are we really that busy that we cant open wine bottles anymore ? The popping of the bubbly - a grand memoir from the past. I'm one of those fools who collect wine corks. For crying out loud, I cant see my collection replaced by shiny mettllic caps. This change - I will resist. Tooth and Nail. Imagine. Perfect lighting. The weather is very amchi mumbai like- heavy with anticipation. The sounds of Khaled put any house party to rythm. Then you hear a soda bottle being unscrewed. Ohh ..its not soda... its wine. This is how we do wine these days... S.O.S.

Take Four:

Mumbai Rocks!

Shake Shake Shake Senora

My favorite packing song is a Harry Belafonte classic called "Jump in the line". Its hard to feel anything but sheer excitement to the beats of this number. And gets me out of packing blues it does. Life is filled with ordinary miracles. Dancing on the bed in a room filled with boxes and bags and overflowing cartons is the ultimate pinnacle. A celebration of sorts - a goodbye and welcome dance at the same time if you will. Doing the moonwalk to Billie Jean while vacuuming is a distant second. And Belafonte makes saying goodbyes far easier than it ought to be.
The funny thing is that most plots, in movies, documentaries, books, journals even the cosmopolitan(yes ..there is always a plot in cosmo - even in the article that says 10 everyday beauty tips every girl must know...) are centered around goodbyes.
Goodbye motherland = Swades
Goodbye High School = Mona Lisa Smile
Goodbye New love = Pretty Woman
Goodbye Old Love = The Holiday
Goodbye Home = Gone with the Wind
Goodbye rampant drug usage, psycho hippie girlfriend, journey of discovery = Shantaram
Goodbye Peter Keating = The Fountainhead
Goodbye Size 10 = Bridget Jones Diary
Goodbye Maximum Security Prison = The Shawshank Redemption
Goodbye Extra Pounds gained during Christmas = Bridget Jones
Goodbye old friends = Dil Chahta Hai
Goodbye psychopath = Seven
Goodbye Good Rational Movie Making = RGV ki Aag
Goodbye Gun Weilding Bandit = Sholay
Goodbye Uncle = Lamhe
Goodbye 1000 crazy islands = Odssey
Goodbye ring = Shakuntala
Goodbye kingdom = Ramayana
...okay ..so we get the picture.
The thing is that no journey would be complete without a tear jerking goodbye thrown in its right between. They are essential for the plot to develop. How is someone like Bridget supposed to develop character unless she shed a zillion pounds, cry copious tears over sleazy ex boss and say a much profane goodbye to him ?!
Or Red - how could he not be upset leaving Jail ? ...free food must have been a great nice to have. Or wearing bright orange clothes all day and having no one to say you're silly. or say Goodbye to the only friend he had in 20 years and not know where he went. Atleast we have Vodafone.
Or Shakuntala - thank god they didnt sell identical clone like copy rings at the accessories section in Macy's back then. Poor Dushyanata would have never known memory loss from gain and love from not.
So Goodbyes are a must!
Change is imminent and so is heartache.
Packing is a disaster.
Crying is optional. But helpful.
Apart from the fact that tears are natural moisturizers for the eyes( which most people forget to moisturize) they also work wonders at collecting a set of assorted handkerchiefs (never ever have to buy one of those again !).
They say that if you look back upon an entire year in your life, close your eyes and run through it in slow motion - and find yourself utterly exhausted overwhelmed and in tears by the end of it ..then it was a year well spent.
This one - most certainly was.
Au Revior ISB.