On a Day like today

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
COLDPLAY



Have you ever had days when you wake up ..and you just feel it in your bones ..that its just best stick your head under the covers and stay in bed ...On a day like today - I'm grateful to just pull through .

In my yoga class today everything seemed that much harder ...when we were doing group stretches ...I was thinking how stretched thin I already felt on a day like today yoga notwithstanding .
Breathing in ..Breating out ..but mostly ..just Breathing .
At the end of the class , my instructor susan came upto me and said - " I'm so glad you've made so much progress in the last year Kaumudi ".
..and while she had unsuspectingly meant the class ..it made me think about some other things too .
I guess I am lucky to have made some progress ..yoga and otherwise and On a day like today ..when everything seems harder somehow ..I guess I am luckier that I am surrounded by friends who recognize my baby steps even when I dont .

So here I am ..at the fag end of a 13 hour day ..and I am mostly thinking about how happy I feel about how things have turned out ..some by my choices and some by virtue of those made by others ..I cant help but think about how my own definition of "happiness" has evolved over time.
I am someone who wants to have it all ..live it all .love it all .I am someone who is drenchfully happy . Years ago ..I'd think to myself when something significant would happen that this was it ..from now on everything would be perfect and it was the start of happiness ..failing to recognize that it wasnt the start ..or the end or even the in between . That was it . That moment was happiness .
Now years older *hush*..I've somehow learnt to let the moments sink in and to celebrate them as they happen..

In the end ..On a day like today I can only summon up and say what someone once said -that today wasnt about the moments in my life but more about the life in my moments ..
Good Night .