How much in denial does one have to be - to even deny being in denial.
Its hard to maintain perspective - the truth is that if things had been going perfectly well - Its unlikely that I would have ever questioned the series of events/decisions that led me to the front of my latest battle.
Unfortunately things are pretty much the anti thesis of everything that was.
Hence -the usual cliche of questions, doubts and agony.
And in the middle of my chaos - I wonder ..when did I become such a expert at handling the disappointment that came from other people so well - that once in a while when I truly knocked the ball out of the court and disappointed myself - I just didnt have the bandwidth to extend that same understanding to myself.
I once read that "In order to find a new place - one has to be truly lost".
I hope its true.
I really do.
Its hard to maintain perspective - the truth is that if things had been going perfectly well - Its unlikely that I would have ever questioned the series of events/decisions that led me to the front of my latest battle.
Unfortunately things are pretty much the anti thesis of everything that was.
Hence -the usual cliche of questions, doubts and agony.
And in the middle of my chaos - I wonder ..when did I become such a expert at handling the disappointment that came from other people so well - that once in a while when I truly knocked the ball out of the court and disappointed myself - I just didnt have the bandwidth to extend that same understanding to myself.
I once read that "In order to find a new place - one has to be truly lost".
I hope its true.
I really do.
2 comments:
If you're truly lost, technically, you are in a new place.
You write beautifully (that's probably an inappropriate/insensitive thing to say, going by the nature of your posts' contents...but still..)
"In order to find a new place - one has to be truly lost"
very true.
Cheers,
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