Video Killed the Radio Star

I moved to Atlanta on a brutally cold sunny day in 2003.
It was the kind of day that Shantaram would have described aptly as a day when the sun was cold and the shadows - colder.
I rented an apartment a day after I moved here - I knew no one in the city and no one knew me.
Free to choose a different past and a build a different future.
My first friend was a 25 inch Sharp TV that I bought from Best Buy - a chunk of my first pay check.
I lugged this heavy TV from best buy into my car only unable to carry it to my apartment.
Frustrated, helpless and psyched out of my mind - I asked the most random person to help me carry it to my place and when we were done - I sat on the carpet with aching muscles and carpet burn looking at this TV. ..feeling a sense of accomplishment that I hadnt felt in a long time.

Then I got the runaround from the cable company to hook up this machine. On a saturday morning weeks later when the cable guy came over to fix the TV- I was so excited.
Before he left - he said something that I'll never forget in my life. He said " You live alone - You need to get a deadbolt- Dont take any chances. Life is too short" .

I had never considered the possibility. I got a deadbolt.
Then it was calm - for months together - it was the TV , me and the deadbolt.

I used to come in from work those first 6 months.Those were days when everything seemed like an uphill struggle - where everyday I gave myself points for just breathing in and out. I look at my apartment - completely empty and unfurnished except for this TV that spoke to me when there was no one else I could talk to. That sang songs and told me stories of hope , love and everything else that I thought was overrated at a time when much was murky for me.

So this TV and me ..we have history.

When Hurricane Ivan stormed and raged chaos outside - I sat at home with the blinds open looking at the lightening and falling branches - watching the news. When cobb county had its first flash flood warning , I saw it on the TV and thought to myself that there better not be a freaking flood because I didnt know what the heck to do.

The ice storm that raged across the south east in early 2004 when the entire city was covered in snow and forced to stay indoors - I had the TV on for 72 hours - I was so scared with the falling trees and accumulating snow and the howling winds - I ended up sleeping on the couch with the bloody TV on. ..and I thought to myself ..thank god I have this TV. ..and I remember feeling so utterly laughable because my sense of security came not from within or from some other person but from a TV. That couldnt be right couldnt it...then agin ..whatever works I guess.This is no method to the maddness is there ?

When I was packing to move to Guragon - The TV was on the entire time I was disintegrating and packing my life into boxes - some of which I never wanted to open again.
Then I came back - and there it was again. Silent while I was studying and boisterous when I was ready for some chit chat.

As the years passed - I spent lesser and lesser time at home with it.
I fell in love with life all over again and Atlanta . The hand that life was dealing out had cards - that said it was time to play and not pack.

Now 4 years down the lane - the tarots read that its time to pack before play.
And even though I am excited about change and the changing times - I cant help but feel a shred of doubt and sadness at letting go of what has constituted as home. A home that I never thought possible - not even at my optimistic best.

Today - I sold my TV.
This is the beginning of the end...officially.
And so the madness begins and while the sun shines down on the south - I can only hope that I can keep the sunshine in my heart for all of this year and like someone once said hold on tightly to the beads of hope on the thread of possibility in my life.